Ok. So. Everyone who knows me…and by knows me I mean reeeeally knows me… knows that I have somewhat of a cheese problem. Most people say they love cheese. I believe them. I do. But the amount of cheese I can eat if it is in my hands is unreal. It’s a problem. Some might call it an obsession of sorts, but hey, it could be worse. For the past two months I would skip perusing the dairy aisle while at the grocery store. Out of sight out of mind, right? The only time I would eat cheese was if my roommate made pizza (because he makes really great pizza) or if I went to a potluck and it ‘happened’ to be there and get into my mouth. Like I said. It’s a problem. But I like challenges.
I was pretty good about it until a new friend of mine called me up last week and asked if I wanted to hang out and eat cheese. What an offer. I’d like to point out that she is a new friend, and didn’t know of my cheese obsession. I sheepishly declined at the time, knowing I had to refrain from buying cheese or I’d be doomed.
The next day I bought some horseradish-bacon-cheddar cheese and ate it all with said friend. We ate the cheese with fried chips that my roommate happened to make an abundance of at work that day. Lucky us. The creamy cheddar swirled on my tongue until the horseradish bite came along, leaving a nice bacony taste behind. The warm, gooey, cheesy door was opened and there was no going back.
At the last Exeter market while I was filling bottles of raw milk for kids to shake up into butter, I became curious about where the raw milk came from. It was from the market. That much I knew. I proceeded to ask Jill, our lovely intern-advisor, where the unlabeled raw milk came from, to which she replied “Brookford Farm.” Brookford farm, eh? I thought to myself. Those are the folks in the back right corner of the room [at the Exeter Market], I thought to myself. They make milk products don’t they… I thought to myself. I wonder if they make… cheese?!
Oh they do. Once I ran out of raw milk and containers for the kiddos to viciously make butter with, I swiftly made my way to the back right corner of the room to check out the scene. I was on a mission. It was important.
There were stacks on stacks of cheese. Cheeses of all kinds! Smoked cheddar, gouda, jalapeno cheddar, bleu cheese, brie, feta, and more! They even had samples! Who knew? Not I… Whether this was a good thing for me to find out or not, I know now, and there’s no going back. But at least it’s local, right?
Here are my Seven Steps to Cheese Success. (Which mostly, sometimes, kind of work for me.)
Step 1: Realize, probably a little late, that you eat waaaay too much cheese.
Step 3: Only buy cheeses for specific meals.
Step 4: Only eat cheese with other people.
Step 5: Stop buying cheese for yourself.
Step 6: Only eat cheese when you go out to dinner or when dishes are made for you.
Step 7: Use all your might to not eat cheese but then realize that cheese is the best thing ever and is on all of your favorite dishes so go back to Step 1.